People

A few months back I did a little spot on Rob Dunger's BBC Suffolk Sunday breakfast show - oh yes, my moment of fame!  I trundled down there for 7am and talked about blogging and Twitter, as well as did a newspaper review.  I really enjoyed the whole experience - which wrapped up with a thought for the day.

I'm not religious so the "thought for the day" was a bit challenging.  I decided to tie things in with what I'd talked about previously: Twitter.  Let's face it, if there's anything I can waffle on ad nauseam, it's that.  Below is an extended version of what I said.

My Thoughts on People

We live in our own little circle of friends, colleagues and family.  Most of us will know perhaps a hundred people tops.  The bulk of these will be superficial contacts: we might know anywhere from a handful to a couple of dozen quite well.  Broadly speaking we will have quite favourable impressions of most of these.  If you think of the people you know, I think most people would say they are anywhere from "okay" to "really quite nice".

Few of us know lots of people who are actually horrendous: there might be someone we dislike, perhaps even strongly; but on the whole the bulk of people most of us know are quite pleasant.  I don't think too many of us know many people who we would categorise as actually dangerous, nasty or evil. 

Despite this fact, we live in a world where we are taught to be cynical, suspicious and to fear. Although our own direct personal experience of other people we've met is broadly positive, most of us, I believe, subscribe to the view that anyone else "out there" whom we don't know is to be viewed with anything from mild suspicion, through cynicism, to outright hostility. 

This view of the world is particularly reinforced by the media.  Of course bad news sells: we gorge ourselves daily on stories of stabbings, con-artists, mini cab drivers who rape, the odd high profile murder etc.  Even the day-to-day stories are pretty grim and pessimistic.  We're thrown the odd scrap of a happy story, but you have to have to look for it amongst the onslaught of misery and depression.  There have been a few attempts at "good news" newspapers: they invariably fall flat on their arses.  No one is interested: we somehow want/need the daily dose of fear and worry.  It is of course epitomised by the Daily Mail/ Fail/ Wail.  It is really no small surprise, if as a result, we have the impression that the world is a horrible place and in particular that people are basically pretty shit. 

However, in fact - I would contend - as you drive through a town, each and every house or flat will in fact be populated by someone remarkably similar to you and to your circle.  The problem is we can't ever know this without knocking on their doors, going in, meeting them and having a cup of tea with them.  They wouldn't of course let us in to their homes to do so, because we're a stranger, and as we know strangers are to be feared because they're potential nut-cases / robbers/ murderers etc.  So we continue to live in our world where our circle is okay and everyone else is almost certainly not.  How can my contention be proven?

Twitter offers an E-Cup of Tea

Enter Twitter, stage right.  Twitter is people.  It is simply a medium where people - for the most part complete strangers - come together.  If you are a user of Twitter who has got to know people you didn't previously, ask yourself what your impression is of those you have encountered and got to know?  I follow 1100 people on Twitter and speak regularly to hundreds.  The medium offers me a snap shot into the lives of all sorts of people I would not otherwise come into contact with: in effect I am knocking on doors and having that e-cup of tea.

Some of these people are from a background I encounter anyway in my regular life; many are not.  Twitter has shown me, for example, that people with whom I might have wildly differing political views, are not inherently "bad" people.  I have developed a great deal of affection for one quite right wing woman who I only viewed as a "troll" at first.  Yes, politically we could argue until the sun comes up, but I wouldn't hesitate to have her over for dinner, or a drink, and I know she is a really humane, decent person - as differing as our views are.

It's very human to dislike people in the "other team".  We're incredibly tribal.  When you're face to face, however, with someone from that other tribe (and can stop yourself from taking a dogmatic position) it is incredibly revealing.  I don't tend to argue politics on Twitter any more: they won't change my mind and I won't change theirs: what it does is just lead to the reinforcement of stereotypes and hostility.  When the British and German soldiers met in the trenches on Christmas Day 1914 to play soccer, they weren't arguing whose foreign policy was correct.  They met as human beings - no longer faceless ones - and it was precisely for that reason that this was considered so dangerous by the High Commands.  When you realise your combatant is a person rather like you - with a mother, a family, friends and a life - and not a faceless monster, you're not so keen to blow them into the next life.

The Trenches, Christmas 1914

Obviously Twitter isn't about killing each other.  But it can be about exposing yourself to a broad range of people and if you're open to doing so, this can be extremely instructive.  I talk to Christians: many gay people view them with a default setting of absolute hostility.  I don't share their religious beliefs and sometimes their moral views, but I can tell you I really have forged some friendships here and have a lot of respect for people I didn't think I would.  I talk to Muslims, to policemen, to housewives, to mothers, to 16 year olds, to taxi drivers, to theatre directors, to students, to QCs, to republicans, to nationalists, to Libertarians and to Marxists.  The range of people you can access and get to know on Twitter is breathtaking.

What I've Learned

What I have come to realise is that Twitter can give us a very real insight into humanity.  It literally does open doors that wouldn't otherwise be open.  We can't in real life gain access to people's homes and lives, but on Twitter people are remarkably willing to share their thoughts, experiences, concerns and feelings.  It teaches much more about all those people we don't know than picking up and reading a newspaper or watching a movie can.

And what are my impressions?  Well I believe my contention is correct.  Put simply, I am repeatedly overwhelmed by the simple warmth, kindness, goodness of almost everyone I encounter. People are good.  They care for one another.  They want to form friendships and have support networks.  They enjoy laughing, socialising and sharing.  This is not the Daily Fail vision of humanity.  It is not the world of headlines of murderers, thieves and rapists.  It is something much more mundane, but something so much better.

Yes, there's the odd bad apple (see previous blogs!) but they are in such a minority.  I've tweeted well over 50,000 times: the number of falling outs and "nastiness" is perhaps 0.05% of that total.  I always try to bear this in mind.  If my sample on Twitter is broadly representative of people "out there" - which it must be - my conclusion is that the world is simply a much better place than we are led to believe... and tend to believe ourselves.

Thank you Twitter, and thank you all the people I talk to on it.

Can't help ending on this diamond ;-)